You have read every article about closure. None of them tell you what to do at 3am with a phone in your hand.
Two of these you write in. One you read once and never need again.
When
- When the message is already typed and you have not sent it.
- When their last seen updates and you feel it in your hands.
- When you need the word for what they did, in writing.
- When it is day twelve and you are tired.
- When they come back exactly when you stopped waiting.
What this is not
- A healing journey
- A course
- Forty minutes of someone talking to a camera
- Advice about self-love
- Anything that tells you it happened for a reason
One · the workbook · $15 separately
DRAFTS
Thirty messages you are not going to send, one letter, one audit.
Thirty prompts, one per page. They run from the ones you would send at 3am, through the ones you would send if you knew they would read them, to the ones you would send if you were over it. Four rules. No schedule. None of them get sent.
Includes
THE LETTER — six parts, the one you do not give them. Then THE AUDIT — seven parts, the cold one. If you only ever do one page, do the audit. If you do it first, it will be wrong.
Two · the field guide · $19 separately
READ RECEIPTS
Twenty-four behaviours, decoded.
Each entry in five moves: what it sounds like, what it usually means, which mechanism it belongs to, and what it predicts. Plus four mechanisms — attachment, intermittent reinforcement, protest behaviour, deactivating strategies — and the glossary: ten words, defined precisely. Breadcrumbing, orbiting, future faking, hoovering. This book never diagnoses anyone.
Three · the programme · $15 separately
30 DAYS
One page a day for the first month of no contact.
Three things a day, about ten minutes. Read one line in the morning. Do one thing. Write one line at night — and a number: how many times you checked. The tracker has thirty boxes and a line that goes down. Five pages to open at the back, for the nights this book was actually written for. It is not going to get steadily easier.
Inside drafts
THE LETTER
The one you do not give them.
Thirty drafts were practice. This is the one. Six parts, in one sitting if you can — about an hour, and it works badly in pieces. Not a shortened version. Not just the last paragraph.
What I am not going to say. What actually happened. What I told myself it meant. What it cost me. What I am keeping. What I am not asking you for.
When you finish you have three options: keep it, destroy it, or leave it in this book. There is no fourth one.
What actually happened.
Inside drafts
THE AUDIT
What was actually good, and what you were putting up with.
Seven parts, and the only part of the workbook with rules. Do it once. Do it in one sitting. Do it with a pen. A diagnosis is a way of not looking at what happened — so the words toxic, narcissist and gaslighting are banned on the page.
If you only ever do one page in this book, do the audit. If you do it first, it will be wrong. Keep this one. The letter you can burn.
Inside
What you get
DRAFTS
Thirty unsent messages. Three sections.
THE LETTER
The one you do not give them, in six parts.
THE AUDIT
Seven parts. The cold one. Keep this.
READ RECEIPTS
Twenty-four behaviours, decoded in five moves.
Four mechanisms
Attachment. Intermittent reinforcement. Protest. Deactivating.
The glossary
Ten words, with their edges put back on.
30 DAYS
One page a day. A line in the morning, one task, a number at night.
The tracker
Thirty boxes, and a line that goes down.
Five pages to open
For the night you want to check their story.
From the pages
None of these get sent. That is the whole design.
DRAFTS
Feelings are a terrible measure of progress because they lie in both directions. The number does not.
30 DAYS
Intensity is not compatibility. Often it is the opposite.
READ RECEIPTS
You wrote a letter and gave it to no one. That is not avoidance.
THE LETTER
THE AFTER
$35
$49 if bought separately
PayPal or card, no account needed. Instant download. Print them or write on them on your tablet.
Questions
No. These are workbooks for personal reflection. They are not therapy, counselling or clinical advice. If you are struggling, talk to someone qualified.
Three PDFs, A5 size: DRAFTS (30 messages, THE LETTER, THE AUDIT), READ RECEIPTS (24 entries, four mechanisms, the glossary), and 30 DAYS (thirty pages, a tracker, five pages to open). You pay with PayPal, then you land back here with the download links. Yours to keep.
Yes. They are designed to be printed at A5, or written on directly in an app like GoodNotes or Notability.
They are instant downloads, so all sales are final. If a file is broken or won't open, email me and I will fix it.